My Review: The Expendables 3 (5/10)

"How hard can it be to kill ten men?"

The third time is the charm, right? Wrong! By now we already know what we are going to get from an Expendables movie. We know it is going to have generic action scenes, very little going on plot wise, and a lack of character development. We've even learned not to expect much from the crowded 90's A-list cast because they are mostly all reduced to caricatures. But if you enjoyed the first two films in this franchise then you are guaranteed to enjoy this as well because it pretty much gives you what you expect. There are plenty of old school action scenes, lots of explosions, and several cheesy one-liners. The nostalgia factor is a key element to these movies, but the problem is that we have seen plenty from these actors recently with a few exceptions. The attracting thing about these films was being able to watch these guys together, but that kind of rubbed off us in the first film.  There is no novelty left and only true fans of the genre will be satisfied. The thing that The Expendables has going for it is that it knows who its target audience is and they focus on them exclusively without even attempting to reach a more mainstream audience. They give fans exactly what they want. I even think this was an improvement from the second film, despite the fact that it was overlong and it became tedious at times. The final climactic scene was also a disappointment and it really doesn't get more generic than that. Plot wise I always forget what these films are about, I can honestly not remember what they were fighting for in the first two films and I imagine I will forget everything about this film in a few days. The main attraction is getting to see these guys working together and all I remember from the second film was the cameo from Chuck Norris and that Van Damme was a satisfying villain. This third film has some interesting cameos, but there is nothing much more to it.

Expendables 3 was directed by Patrick Hughes, who directed the little known but warmly received Red Hill in 2010. The story is basically the same as the previous two films in the franchise with some new additions and a new villain. This time the Expendables have to face a former founder of the team, Stonebanks (Mel Gibson), who has turned into a dangerous arm dealer. We are first introduced to Barney (Stallone) and his crew as they are freeing a former partner named Doc (played by Wesley Snipes). Together they embark on a mission to try to stop Stonebanks and along the way Barney signs up a younger crew with the recruiting help of Bonaparte (Kelsey Grammar). Other than Mel Gibson and Wesley Snipes the other new faces in this film are Antonio Banderas who plays a comical Spanish character named Galgo and Harrison Ford who has replaced Bruce Willis' Church as one of the directors who hires Barney's team. So there is a lot of testosterone in this film with scenes of these buffed up guys carrying weapons on one hand and a beer on the other. It is the ultimate definition of macho men from the 90's. It is even comical at times so I found it hard to keep a straight face, especially with all the cheesy dialogue. I did enjoy Snipes performance as I hadn't seen him in over a decade. Antonio Banderas was a bit too comical and Mel Gibson really didn't present a real threat as the villain. The film really suffers from a poor screenplay and it wastes the talented cast perhaps because there are just too many characters and so little time for a decent and engaging story. We never really care for any of these characters and I'm surprised I even remembered some of their names despite having seen them in 3 films already.

My Review: Transformers Age of Extinction (4/10)

"But when you look up to the stars, think of them as my soul."

Michael Bay is back at it again delivering a longer and louder sequel full of headache inducing action scenes. It's funny that a film like this, with no soul, puts so much emphasis in trying to convince us that these Transformers actually have one. The film felt like a parable warning us about the dangers of cloning and animal testing, but it was completely uninspiring. There was no reason for this film to be so long and at times I think that the over extended action scenes end up becoming anti-climactic. There is a scene at the beginning of the film where a theater owner is complaining how sequels are killing the industry (a clear parody of itself) and if Bay was trying to make fun of critics as old timers then I wouldn't mind being called a grumpy old man because this film was just terrible. The characters in this film are completely one dimensional and their sole purpose in this film was to allow for an excuse to jump from one action scene to the next. You have the now classic female lead role from Bay not doing anything else than looking good in front of the camera, and several attempts at humor from the rest of the supporting characters who simply seem to be in the movie in order to give funny one-liners. For every funny line, there were ten that didn't work. The film does look great; there is a beautiful scenery and cool looking CGI action scenes but it simply felt like another empty attempt at delivering a loud blockbuster. For Bay it seems like more is better, but for me with every new sequel that comes out I grow more unresponsive towards these cartoon characters that I once loved as a young kid. It's a shame because I did like the first film, but the sequels have ruined it for me.

Having Mark Wahlberg play the lead role instead of Shia LaBeouf was an interesting move considering he is more of an action star. I tend to like Wahlberg's action films, but he wasn't enough to save this film considering the real stars are the soulless giant metal robots. I also found Stanley Tucci to be a great addition although at times he did get on my nerves, but the blame for that has to be put on the poor script written by Ehren Kruger. It's as if for two and a half hours we got beat over the head with one repeated action scene after another. I don't know, the entire experience left me a bit dumbstruck and I was utterly disappointed even though my expectations were really low going into this sequel. At times I wondered if Bay's title, "Age of Extinction,"was referring to the future of blockbusters, but when I thought of what other directors did with films like X-Men and Edge of Tomorrow (to mention a few) I calmed down and realized some directors actually are making smart and intelligent blockbusters. Bay on the other hand is making the same film over and over again with the exception that they get longer and louder. Fans who are looking for this will be pleased because Bay gives you an all you can eat buffet of action scenes involving giant metal robots battling off one another while cities are being destroyed. I never thought I would say this, but Pacific Rim was a much better movie at that.